Time for another fact or fiction piece. Turns out, the great camel bloodline originated in North America. While that might not seem to make much sense to literally anyone who knows something about camels, a speaker at a recent TED conference explained how camels may may maintain a great adaptability to life in arid climates by building off of a preexisting adaptability to the great tundras we all know and hate so well.

Don’t believe it?

As the story goes, Natalia Really-Hard-Last-Name was out hiking in the remote regions above the Arctic Circle in the Canadian Tundra when she spotted something that seemed to be fossilized wood. Upon closer inspection, she realized she had found a fragment of really old bone bone. After trudging out to the exact same area repeatedly, like a crazed mental patient on a mission, she found many more.

She tried unsuccessfully for a long time to piece the fragments together. Eventually she resorted to a computer program because, you know, puzzles are hard. The program identified the necessary patterns and placed them together beautifully. She realized that she had uncovered part of a tibia from a long-dead cloven-hoofed mammal. Or Satan. Only time would tell which.

For the life of her, she couldn’t figure out what kind of mammal it belonged to. A few years passed. She then happened upon a crazy-smart man discussing the various “fingerprints” of an animal’s collagen. Not sure what collagen is? Go look it up. We don’t hold hands here.

Anyway, one can apparently determine an animal’s species from the subtle differences in that collagen. Natalia had already uncovered collagen from the great mystery bone and so, determined to let other people and even computer programs do all her life’s work for her, she used FedEx to shuttle a bone fragment to Collagen-man. Indeed, she used FedEx–even though everyone worth their salt knows you go with UPS.

The crazy-smart man identified the fragment as belonging to a camel. Shocker.

The real question was why the camel had ventured so far north, as apparently scientists have long known about the camel’s mystic origins (apparently it was a dark secret long kept away from the masses, much like chem trails and Area 51).

Natalia Long of Name thinks she knows the answer, and it’s a pretty wild theory. The hump on a camel’s back, which as most none of us know is used to store fat, could have originally helped it survive a long winter. The large cloven hoofs could have acted like a pair of snow shoes. Boom.

And guess what: this story is fact. Check it out below!


About Author

Jeff is a self-proclaimed pragmatic futurist; that is, he has high hopes for absurd life-altering technologies which sound too good to be true, and probably are. Although he writes on a variety of subjects, his real passion is for technological innovation and the people who make it happen. By day, he enjoys fuzzy bunnies, kittens, puppies, roller coasters and a sardonic written word or two. By night, he's busy running MMR, replaying a random Final Fantasy game, or pretending to be Batman. He currently resides in Upstate NY.